Hikari
by Ziven
Summary: Yami has nothing to live for-or does he? Can he see the angel right in front of his eyes before he gives up on the world? TWOSHOT.SHOUNENAI FLUFF. Songfic to the translation of Utada Hikaru's Hikari. YuugixYami
1. Chapter 1

Hikari 

**Chapter 1:**

_No matter what the time_

_I'm just alone_

_Destiny forgotten,_

_Even though I kept going_

_Inside of the sudden light I awaken_

_In the middle of the night._

I felt so alone that night, like many of the nights before. To attempt to drain my sorrows, I went to see those like me, those also in my predicament.

They did not help.

They did not suffer as I suffered; they did not lose what I had lost. They did not have the only life they had searched for ripped fro their hands, thrust into a world they could not truly adjust to.

Unlike me, they had found a place in this world. They, the both of them, had things here that were worth staying for.

Not that I did not; I simply did not understand the true value of my possessions. I only compared them to what was taken from me, and did not see them in their full glory.

Soon I left my companions' home, tired of listening to the same lecture that was always meant to cheer me up, but never did.

As I walked to my own home, it began to rain. Contrary to my usual analogy between rain and sadness, it felt nice; now I understood why Jounouchi liked it so much. It gave me the feeling…that the heavens felt sorry for me, cried for me. The rain was my only companion now. I thought I had done the right thing, staying here…

But soon, I began noticing things. I began to see that everything here was artificial; everything here lacked the vibrancy and life that I was used to. It just wasn't the same.

And I didn't even know why I was there. I had served my purpose; I had fulfilled my destiny. There was nothing more for me to do.

"_There is always something more to do,"_ Bakura once told me. In fact, he had told me that when I had visited him.

I didn't believe that it was true.

When I reached the Kame Game shop, I did not know at all what time it was. I had wandered until the rain stopped, and I had lost all track of where I was, sometimes heading in the opposite direction simply because it was still raining. Somehow, it didn't feel right to leave the rain alone, after it had come to my aid.

The door opened almost before I reached to knock. I had forgotten all about the spare key in my right pocket.

"Yami, what happened?" I called him my aibou, and her was living up to the name right then; I'd thought that he would be asleep.

I shook my head, taking off my shoes and shaking them clean in the night; that way, I wouldn't taint his house with the rain that had kept me company.

"Yami…?" he said, and even I didn't need my puzzle to tell me that his concern was genuine. Had I not been so distant from reality at the time, I would have felt a bit guilty.

Instead, I walked barefoot up the stairs (I had removed my socks; they were soaking wet) and wordlessly stepped into the bathroom. Yuugi followed me, but I paid him not mind. I stripped myself of my attire, drying off with a towel from a rack on the wall. Soon enough, Yuugi came to the door with a new set of clothes and another towel, and wordlessly helped me dry my hair.

Normally, I would have minded, had Yuugi not been my lover.

I thought about our situation then, and finally realized the impact I had on Yuugi. Yes, his title was my lover, but nothing about our relationship held any love. As much as I hate to admit it now, back then Yuugi's love had meant nothing to me. I merely used him, as if it were possible to pull him into my despair, so that I would not be alone.

The more I thought about it, the more I knew I did not want anyone to experience my pain and sadness…

I did not want anyone to be as torn up inside as I was…

* * *

Hiya! First, don't get mad! I'm still going to update Calm...Chapter 17 of that is coming tomorrow, so all of you can be in suspense...

About this story...I liked it when I wrote it, but now...not so much. I thought it was a little too sappy for Yami, but I'm trying to get all of my fanfics up (I've written way more than I've typed up) and this is one of the two-shots along the way. Stay tuned and stuff...the next chapter is...a little fluffy, I think...

"I will return, for I am the darkness..."


	2. Chapter 2

Hikari 

**Chapter 2:**

_Quietly,  
__Stand in the exit way,  
__And, in the pitch black, take the light._

The next morning, I awoke in my bed with Yuugi lying against me. Despite how I felt inside, the sight of him sleeping so peacefully made me smile. He cared about me so much, and yet I could not bring myself to return his feelings.

And maybe, if I did not attach myself to something on this earth, perhaps I could go back. Perhaps the heavens would engulf me, and my weary soul could rest in peace.

And despite that thought, my heart fluttered at the sight of Yuugi. It always did, though I barely felt it.

Wordlessly, I rose from the bed, taking Yuugi from the mattress to my arms, and carrying him from my room to his. I laid him on his own bed, and tucked him in. He stirred once in my arms, and I smiled when he did not wake.

I had to distance myself from him. His feelings were capturing me, taking me prisoner.

But as I walked to the door, planning on leaving everything behind, I stopped, looking back at Yuugi.

He truly cared about me, so much. I must have really worried him when I came home late the night before.

Yuugi stirred in his bed, turning over and mumbling my name in worried tones.

I couldn't make myself leave him alone after that. I lost my ability to move myself away from him, away from my feelings.

And with a light yawn, his eyes blinked open. The violet orbs took me in, and despite his tiredness, I could see sadness appear in them.

"Yami…" he said softly, and shook his head, "don't go." His eyes pleaded with me, begged me not to leave.

Not that I would have been able to.

It was in that moment that I realized how closely tied I was to Yuugi. Not only mentally, but physically, and, a much as I did not want to admit it at the time, spiritually.

"There is always something more to do…" 

Yuugi, I knew then, was my new task. Not helping Yuugi to save the world, not using him to help someone else. Him. I was there to love him, to wipe the tears from his eyes and rid them of that look of worry…

The look of worry that I put there.

It was then that my body chose to move, when I decided my steps would be toward Yuugi, not away from him. I sat beside his form on the bed, and he hesitated.

He did not know whether he could move closer to me.

More proof that I had taken the wrong path. As weary as I was, as much as I wanted rest, I had not discovered my own happiness. I had not helped myself. I had foolishly thought that the past, that my memories were to fill the empty place in my heart, and tht I was not to remain after I found them; I thought I would be complete.

"Yuugi…" I said relunctantly. How were supposed to speak to someone you had neglected for so long?

It seemed to be all I needed to say, however, because in the following moment, Yuugi's left hand covered my right, and he flashed a tentative smile, as if he did not know what to make of the situation yet.

I did not trust my mouth to convey my feelings.

"Yami, are you alright?" He asked. He paused, then pulled me down next to him, covering me with the blanket. "You were out in the rain all night yesterday; you could get a col. Yami…I don't want you to get sick."

I nodded slightly, turning to face him, and I could spot a small fleck of happiness in his eyes. I am very proud to say that I gave him that happiness. It was a beautiful start, a second chance if I had ever seen one. And finally, I knew I had a reason to exist; I had found my something to live for.

_No matter what the time_  
_We'll always be together  
__No matter what the time  
__Because you're by my side  
__The light known as "you" finds me,  
__In the middle of the night._

* * *

Yup. That's the end of that ficcy. Without realizing it, 'till the end, I was inspired by samurai-ashes' "Chains that Define" and DragonClan Warrior's "A Soul's Last Mission."

I liked it, though I feel like might have confused some people in the middle. But, you're the judge...let me know.

"I will return, for I am the darkness..."


End file.
